watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
