Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Farmville is her only friend.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
