You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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