okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
