U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
