I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
