how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
