Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
