i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
