New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Randomize
