You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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