Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
