Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
