i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Randomize