At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize