I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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