Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
