My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize
