can u get pink eye on your cock?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
