Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
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