I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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