I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
honey bunches of taint.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
