We won't sleep together?
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
