i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
