you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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