the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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