If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
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