She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize