i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
