Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Randomize