when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize
