Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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