and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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