Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize