awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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