I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
