Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize