You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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