Banned from zoo.
Again?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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