he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
