Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.

(614): View more from Ohio

Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.

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(816): View more from Missouri

We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.

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(815): View more from Illinois

Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again

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(218): View more from Minnesota

No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk

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(216): View more from Ohio

I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.

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(330): View more from Ohio

we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it

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(707): View more from California

I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"

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(478): View more from Georgia

I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."

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(620): View more from Kansas

I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.

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