Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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