so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
