you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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