He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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