went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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