Her vagina should come with caution tape.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
