return my video game
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize