do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Randomize
