And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize