so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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