wake up i wanna do it froggy style
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
